Things That Grown Women Just Don’t Wear…

Things That Grown Women Just Don’t Wear…

by: Marsha Maung

Apart from diapers, you mean? Even then, that’s questionable since we do use sanitary napkins…which…erm, some kids liken to a nappy. I know of one mother who actually said it was a nappy to her kids! I was like….argh, eugh, gross…but she took it in her stride, raising her eyebrows asking, “What do YOU suggest I tell them?”
I don’t know…but I told my son that it was none of his business and if he ever dares to touch those…erm, stuff or take it out of the room, I will personally see that his PC game privileges are taken away from him. And he refuses to look into my personal drawer after that.
I am no clothes-horse in person and it was only a couple of hours ago that my aunt in Dubai called me to tell me that I was sloppy. In my personal opinion, I am ‘carelessly casual’. Hey, can you blame me for being so when I work at home and have to consider changing in and out of clothes often because there’s pee, poo, spit, vomit…and what-have-you-nots on them. I do have to take care of my kids, you know! Donald Trump is, unfortunately, out of my league and he’s not my father, so, I have to take care of the kids and work at home at the same time, ok?
And since I work at home, is there a point to dress up in coats and skirts….what, to please my computer?
Anyway, in my personal opinion, there are several things that women shouldn’t wear, under ANY circumstance.
ONE, pigtails. I used to have long hair and whenever I had to perform one of those ‘ah-sam’ (women who have to perform lots of house chores) work, I would tie pigtails. Now I don’t. Why? Well, one of my cousins once asked me if I was trying to behave, act and look like a maid. If I walked side-by-side with my maid, they’d think I was the maid cause even my maid does not wear pigtails.
TWO, overcoats. In this friggin’ weather?? Come on. But even if I was living in a very cold country, I would only wear an overcoat if someone threatened to shave my eyebrows off, ok?
THREE, checkered red and black skirts. ….and look like I was wearing a kilt? Come on. Besides, Kilts are for Scottish MEN, mind you, not sensible women.
FOUR, socks that goes up to the knee. You want to look girly, go for plastic surgery, dear. Wearing socks that goes up to your knee will only make you look like you’re out of your mind, not younger.
FIVE, frilly frocks. Lord, only people who belong in an asylum will want to wear a frilly frock. Or are you pretending to be a princess in the making? Look, if you’re 30 ot 40 years old, wearing a frilly frock makes you look like you don’t know the difference between your nose and your knee.
For aging women, the best thing is to go for simple and casual stuff….back to the kind of clothes I would wear anytime of the day. As long as it is kept simple, nice, tidy, classy and not creased like you’d been snogging with your fave bloke behind the curtain, you should be safe.
Coming from a person who would rather be shot in the toe than wear high heels, you might want to consider whether you want to listen to me yap on about FASHION or not.

About The Author

Marsha Maung is a freelance graphic designer and copy writer who works from her home in Selangor, Malaysia. She loves nothing more than blowing bubbles in the park with her 2 kids, Joshua and Jared and considers getting her hair yanked while playing horsey. To her, it’s a privilege she treasures. She is the author of “Raising little magicians”, and the popular “The Lance in freelancing”. More information can be found at http://www.marshamaung.com.

This article was posted on March 23, 2005